The Whore Returns to Whoring

I'm back. For photos of the Long, Lazy (and Inebriated) Weekend, see Middlebrow's latest post. Of course, I had to readjust to home life (drink green tea and check my email) before I could begin writing this morning.
But still, I managed to write about 2,000 words. My mind is also consumed with silly tasks to be done. Plus Son's last day of school is Thursday, and there is the portfolio to finish and photographs to be picked up.
And a trip to Costco, for healthy food, now that Middlebrow and I are (once again) on the eat heathy spend less money trip. (We seem to take this trip periodically, and then return to our insane eating and spending ways.)
Middlebrow tried to convince me over the weekend that we should buy a Honda Element. I think this was brought on by trying to pack all of us and our stuff plus the dog into the little Saturn. But on a hike, I managed to talk him into buying a used vehicle for camping, meaning no car payment and no worrying about mileage, since we will only use it for trips. I think it could work.

The Tyranny of the Child's Birthday Party

As Middlebrow and I sat last night contemplating where (o where?) we might be able to have Son's 6th Birthday party, we remembered: we never had no stinking parties!!
When we were kids, we maybe had a few friends over and played pin the tail on the donkey. Since my birthday is in December, we couldn't have an outdoor party. I don't remember any parties from when I was a kid. Except when I was in 8th grade and my best friend and I had a joint birthday party at the Holiday Inn. Complete with sleep over at the hotel, swimming and miniature golf. Those were the days, baby!
But as I edged nearer to a nervous breakdown last night, wrestling with the guilt I would feel if we didn't invite everyone, imagining the school ostracisim of us, the exclusive partiers, trying to figure out how we were going to either a) pay for every child in his Kindergarten class to go bowling or b) fit everyone in his Kindergarten class into our 500 sq. ft. home, Middlebrow came up with an elegant solution so simple it boggled the mind: no party.
What? you will say. No party! But listen here: I hardly ever had parties, and I turned out fine. When Son was 4 we took his whole pre-school class bowling. Were we nuts? yes! It was insane!
Last year we invited just the boys to our house for a Spiderman birthday.
But this year: Middlebrow will take Son and a friend or two for an afternoon extravaganza. The benefits: no presents! no paper plates! no pizza and cake to throw away! no goodie bags!
Son and I will make a cake to his specifications. Frosting! Decorations! Hooray!
And we don't have to spend $200 to do it! Ah, the liberation of simplicity!