Scone-ology

It's a thing now, the study of scones. Or the theory of scones, which one must have if one is to 1) make scones 2) make other things, and (most importantly, but don't tell the scones) 3) survive baking season.

I was telling someone, someone who also likes to make scones and apparently makes them every weekend, about my difficulty making scones, and she totally misunderstood (maybe I was drunk, I don't know) but she said the answer is the pastry cutter and I needed a pastry cutter, and so I politely agreed because she just didn't understand, and what's the point?

But now, friends, I will attempt to explain to you what I could not explain to her: it's not the butter! The butter, cut into small cubes and refrozen for an appropriate amount of time, the butter you simply dump into the food processor and do the pulsing thing, and then wala, you have the base of the dough, but NO, the problem, friends, is the cream. The cream!

Now, I don't want to say the cream is problematic as if this were a character flaw on the part of cream, because cream is lovely, right? It's soft and delicate and blameless. No, the problem, as it were, is that the cream doesn't really want to make friends with the dough.

The recipe I follow says to make a little mound of the dough and then make a divot in it and then pour the cream and then cupping your hands like tiny shovels, lightly move the dough into the trough of cream and do this without screaming obscenities and don't mix it too much or else it gets gummy and then somehow (the recipe doesn't say how) get it all to stick together (but barely, barely!) and then make it into a circle and then, quick, before one portion cedes, cut them into triangles and get them into the oven where the still slightly frozen butter can work its magic.

Well. You can see my dilemma. The first two times I made scones I was perfectly happy to participate in the charade that cupping the hands and yadda yadda yadda would result in scone magic. But last time, this last time, I just said, you know what? Screw it. I'm just going to pour in enough cream until the dough just has no choice but to stick together because that's what dough does, and then I'm going to make it into a flat disc and I'm going to use the scone cutter that I bought and I'm going to cut circles and then I'm just going to bake them.
And you know what? They were still perfectly delicious and better than 99.99% of the scones I've ever consumed, ever, except the ones made by my friend at that bakery in Bellingham. So that's a win right? Scones 0, Me 1. I win!

But, also, and here's the important part: recipes exist for a reason. I need them. I do. Even when I've made something a million times I look at the recipe for reassurance, like checking in just to make nothing's changed since the last time, even though I know what I'm doing. I do. So what I've learned, my scone-ology, is that you need the recipe, yes. But if you are going to survive baking season, and baking in general, you have to go with the flow. Baking is about nothing if not the current context. Sometimes the temperature in the kitchen is greater or lesser. Sometimes you have hot hands. You just do. Sometimes the butter is better or worse.

But you know what? The scones always taste just fine. In fact, they taste delicious.

Christmas by the Numbers

Christmas movies watched: Two (Elf, Charlie Brown Christmas)
Meals cooked: Zero! (Christmas Eve at a friend's, Christmas brunch at a friend's, tamales from Victor's)
Movies watched on Christmas: Harry Potter & The Half-Blood Prince, G-Force
Good gifts bought for Middlebrow: 3 (whiskey glasses, Django Rheinhard CD, guitar book)
Gift for MB that was really for both of us: 1 (Mark Bittman's Kitchen Express)
Great gifts received: Many! (Running shirt from my sister, sweater from MB, gloves from Ross)
Cookies eaten: infinite! Too many! Make it stop!
Books read since school ended: Two? Age of Innocence & Year of the Flood.
Things to do between now & Jan 11: So many! I choose not to think about this now.

Current Obsessions

Since I got back from Vegas, I have been thinking about the menus for the various days and meals we will or should be eating in the coming days. I have also been trying to pick and choose from among the traditional cookies my family usually makes, asking Son for his input of course.
I haven't made much progress, but I have made some decisions (sort of?). To wit:

• Christmas Eve: MB has decided that this year, instead of making tamales, we will buy them from Victor's. We took a research trip out there. Delicious!
• Christmas Day: We'd like to have some local, organic meat, baked potatoes and Caesar Salad. Easy!
• Appetizers: On Christmas Eve, I'd like to have a selection of appetizers, like the obvious veggie platter, perhaps with our traditional cottage cheese dip or maybe something new, like this herbed goat cheese dip? Or perhaps these Spanish style tapas, such as shrimp or tortilla?
• What about Christmas morning? I think I'll make the cranberry maple cake I made this year. See these pics from last year.
• Cookies? I already made the peanut butter chocolate bars. Son demands the 7 Layer Bars. I bought stuff for the peanut butter kiss cookies, but might not make them, because we have to make sugar cookies. Those are required. I'm trying to draw the line there, but I will miss the oatmeal butterscotch chip cookies. But oh well. I'm trying hard not to gain too much weight over break.
• Drinks? Red wine of course, and maybe some Claus-mopolitans. And perhaps some more bubbly wine. And egg nog, with rum of course. And maybe some Baileys to add to the coffee. Yum....
  

I would love to hear what you will be eating, especially ideas for appetizers. I think I would rather eat lots and lots of appetizers and save myself the trouble of making any big meals.

I Love Coffee!

I didn't post yesterday, but for good measure let's just say that yesterday I was thankful to reach a milestone in end of the semester hoops (almost done!) and that I was also thankful that we found the place we got our tree last year, a local garden shop and the tree was less than $50 (which seems to be the starting price?!), and it took us about half-an-hour.

Today, I am thankful for coffee. MB tipped me off to this cool & funny tribute to coffee, which I share with you. Today I'm going to finish grading and decorate the tree (it's small and really quite adorable). Then I'll take Gus for a walk (off leash!), and then go to Book Club. I'm thankful for all these little gems in my life (dog, books, friends, canyons, etc.).

Pics & Things

Here are the delicious tamales that Middlebrow and I assembled with our own hands. It was labor intensive, but delicious. Also, these are the new plates my mom gave us for our birthdays.










We decorated the cookies! And they were the best Christmas cookies ever. Notice the kangaroo. We have two kinds of cookie cutters: Christmas and animals. We used both.


















The Cranberry Maple Pudding Cake. Delicious for Christmas breakfast.










Middlebrow is manly. He got an Ops Knife ("not a weapon. For use as a tool only.") and some binoculars. If you have any Special Ops, he's the man for the job.

















The post-present mess. The table is filled with Son's presents. MB is wearing the Smartwool running shirt I gave him. We had a Smartwool Christmas at our house. I also gave him Smartwool running socks and he gave me a sweater. Warm and toasty, but soft.

Christmas Presents

The best thing ever happened to me: Son bought me a Christmas present and wrapped it himself. I'm not sure what is better: the gift, or the wrapping. I don't really want to open it because if I do, that's it, the end of the first present Son ever wrapped for me. It's adorable. He just slathered it in paper and taped it together and then wrapped some ribbon around it and taped it. It's so cute! I love it! The best present ever! I don't even care what it is!
The other best present: dinner with the girls at Martine. Delicious! We had...what? Chorizo and red peppers with polenta(so good), portabello mushroom stuffed with shrimp (also good), clams with some kind of red sauce (also the best!), lamb meatballs, scallops and so much more! (i.e., red wine)
Then I came home and there was another present for me!! And MB had organized the whole house. We went to IKEA again on Monday for shelves and other organizational aids, so our house is basically tip-top.
Actually it's warm and cozy and very Christmasy.
We will make sugar cookies on Saturday, maybe other cookies on Sunday (MB's diet really interferes with the baking!), and tamales on Saturday. Then maybe some kind of meat, etc, for Christmas. Oh! I also want to make a cranberry cake for Christmas morning! We'll see how that goes.

All He Wants for Christmas Is....

Son brought home a few Thanksgiving related exercises from school. You know, they made turkeys and cards and talked about what they were thankful for.
Son brought home a cared for Middlebrow. On the front was a picture of a turkey, a pie stamp, a sticker that said "Fish." And under that he had written "Beer."
Inside it said
Dad: I like pie. I like turkey. I like cranberries. I like beer.

I think we're lucky we have a liberal teacher. No one sent a note home about his beer lovin'. No one mentioned it to me. But I did say, "Maybe you shouldn't talk about liking beer at school. They're going to send Social Services." Which led to a lengthy discussion of what Social Services is.
And then, later, Son said, "What if I wrote to Santa and said, Dear Santa, I want beer. Please bring me a six-pack of beer?"
I replied that I didn't think Santa would bring him beer, as it's illegal.
"What if he wrote on it For Son only? Son, Son, Son?"
What indeed. I'm almost tempted to leave a six-pack of something under the tree for him. Maybe Root Beer?