Friday, June 13, 2008

Author Photos: Good, Bad & Hilarious

I've seen some bad author photos. And I do not want to be the subject of those. I was going to post some (of other people, of course), but then I thought that was too mean. So here, for my small blogging universe, I offer some candidates with tag lines. Judge for yourself.


Dr. Write is grainy and maybe sleepy? Her eyes are not exactly focused. But she remains in good humor. Her hair looks good for once! She is grateful for her friend's skill with the camera. She doesn't really look like this. In any case, this is just her head. She has a body too, but she doesn't want you to see that.

Dr. Write looks dreamily into the future. In the original of this photo, there was a huge bottle of wine that had to be cropped out. Is her bra showing? Well, at least it's not a nipple. She's looking across the table at a book editor, sending subliminal messages such as "publish my book" and "don't eat the duck pate."


This is Dr. Write's usual pose: mouth open. But usually her eyes are also closed. Where is she? She doesn't even know the people who own this house, she just climbed over the fence to use this chair and the deck. And maybe to steal some beverages. Can you see her tonsils? This might have been right before the police showed up.

8 comments:

theorris said...

Of these 3, I prefer option 1: dozy, grainy Dr. Write, although #3 would be playful and might get you a ticket to the comedy circuit.

With that, I have a much better picture of you that is ensconced in the sacred English Department Cabinet of All that is Holy and Appropriate. Have you seen it?

theorris said...

Oh and the second one can be used when they excerpt a story from your collection in Playboy. Now your market!

susansinclair said...

There's something about black and white that adds gravitas...try #2 in sepia and see what happens! (Oh, and you inspired me...check out my choice on my blog...)

Counterintuitive said...

I just read someone--can't remember who--commenting on how they hate author shots with their pets. I guess, if you believe this someone,this cuts Gus out of the picture.

BTW congratulations on your "embarrassment of riches"--meant to tell you at Unhip's gig but didn't.

Nik said...

Methink the first one.

Lisa B. said...

Grainy Dr. Write is beautiful. All the commentary is hilarious, and it would be swell if that could be included. See if you can negotiate that in your contract.

ErinAlice said...

To capture the real you the picture should be of you, head slightly tilted, mouth open, eyes closed but not is not what an author photo is about is it??? I like the black and white as it adds a sense of mystery. Also, it makes the skin look flawless!!

Limon de Campo said...

I agree that the first pic is tres chic and beautiful: all important authors are grainy.

But I still vote for #2. Showing a hint of bra (or bra-like garmentry) makes you appear both brilliant and possibly desirous of (metaphoric) sex with your readers. People pay lots of money for that marketing angle!!