Saturday, May 27, 2006

Gary Coleman Watch 2006

A few weeks ago, in a glucose slump, I took Son to Sonic Burger. It was a place we could agree on. I let him come up into the front seat (the car was parked; it's not like I'm Britney) to eat.
As we were eating, and I was lamenting the general lack of Ketchup (Sonic Burger is decidedly anti-Ketchup), I looked up to see a short African-American man driving a blue VW Bug through the drive-through. My first thought was, "That guy's not old enough to drive!" My second thought was "That's Gary Coleman!" He had pulled his car forward in the drive-through and was having an animated conversation with the teenage boy who had brought him his food. The boy walked away. The young blonde sitting next to Gary rubbed the back of his neck while he gestured wildly and generally gave off an angry vibe. It was busy at Sonic Burger, so Gary was forced to sit in his car with the blonde rubbing his neck, while the two teenage boys who seemed to be running the joint dashed about attending to the other customers. Five or ten minutes later, the teenage boy returned to Gary's window holding what can only be described as an astounding amount of ketchup packets in one hand. He shoved these through Gary's window. Gary gesticulated and shouted. The teenage boy walked away. Gary pulled forward to the garbage can and inserted an unidentifiable object into it. He drove away.
I was about 75% sure it was Gary Coleman until I told Otter Butt this story. She said she recently heard that he had moved to Provo. So now I'm about 95% sure.
Welcome to the Promised Land, Gary!

4 comments:

Clint Gardner said...

Yeah he apparently made a movie down there and liked it so he stuck around. I see his court-ordered anger management classes didn't take.

Condiment said...

I did an episode of "Son of the Beach" about five or six years ago with him. He's even more tragic than he seems because he was doing security at the Glendale Mall (where the court order came in to being, I think) and lately he's been doing local check cashing ads and Loan-until-your-payday type stuff. We know that Kimberly was a drug addict and/or an anorexic, but what happened to Willis?

By the way, I wanted to plug my newly added "Recent Celebrity Sightings" sidebar over at the Front Porch...

Anonymous said...

Well, I'm not sure about G. Coleman, but I'm rather fond of Sonic. I don't think either are to be found in NYC but I'll keep my eyes out, OK?
Cheers.

Nik said...

How can I leave SLC now that we have a project?