Scone-ology

It's a thing now, the study of scones. Or the theory of scones, which one must have if one is to 1) make scones 2) make other things, and (most importantly, but don't tell the scones) 3) survive baking season.

I was telling someone, someone who also likes to make scones and apparently makes them every weekend, about my difficulty making scones, and she totally misunderstood (maybe I was drunk, I don't know) but she said the answer is the pastry cutter and I needed a pastry cutter, and so I politely agreed because she just didn't understand, and what's the point?

But now, friends, I will attempt to explain to you what I could not explain to her: it's not the butter! The butter, cut into small cubes and refrozen for an appropriate amount of time, the butter you simply dump into the food processor and do the pulsing thing, and then wala, you have the base of the dough, but NO, the problem, friends, is the cream. The cream!

Now, I don't want to say the cream is problematic as if this were a character flaw on the part of cream, because cream is lovely, right? It's soft and delicate and blameless. No, the problem, as it were, is that the cream doesn't really want to make friends with the dough.

The recipe I follow says to make a little mound of the dough and then make a divot in it and then pour the cream and then cupping your hands like tiny shovels, lightly move the dough into the trough of cream and do this without screaming obscenities and don't mix it too much or else it gets gummy and then somehow (the recipe doesn't say how) get it all to stick together (but barely, barely!) and then make it into a circle and then, quick, before one portion cedes, cut them into triangles and get them into the oven where the still slightly frozen butter can work its magic.

Well. You can see my dilemma. The first two times I made scones I was perfectly happy to participate in the charade that cupping the hands and yadda yadda yadda would result in scone magic. But last time, this last time, I just said, you know what? Screw it. I'm just going to pour in enough cream until the dough just has no choice but to stick together because that's what dough does, and then I'm going to make it into a flat disc and I'm going to use the scone cutter that I bought and I'm going to cut circles and then I'm just going to bake them.
And you know what? They were still perfectly delicious and better than 99.99% of the scones I've ever consumed, ever, except the ones made by my friend at that bakery in Bellingham. So that's a win right? Scones 0, Me 1. I win!

But, also, and here's the important part: recipes exist for a reason. I need them. I do. Even when I've made something a million times I look at the recipe for reassurance, like checking in just to make nothing's changed since the last time, even though I know what I'm doing. I do. So what I've learned, my scone-ology, is that you need the recipe, yes. But if you are going to survive baking season, and baking in general, you have to go with the flow. Baking is about nothing if not the current context. Sometimes the temperature in the kitchen is greater or lesser. Sometimes you have hot hands. You just do. Sometimes the butter is better or worse.

But you know what? The scones always taste just fine. In fact, they taste delicious.

Some Birthday Thoughts

Since it is my birthday, I thought I would include some Deep Thoughts here for your edification.

1. Birthdays are just another day. But on this day, I feel I set the tone for the coming year. I also feel this way about New Year's Day, so I try to do things I think will bode well for the next 365 days. So today, I worked out (good, right?) and then had breakfast (also good, yes?). With friends. I think this last part is key.
2. Surround yourself with happy people. (see above)
3. Set goals you can accomplish. Next year I want to be grateful, to be happy, to enjoy life and appreciate my friends. I also would like to be injury & pain free.
4. Try to see the good in the bad. I wasn't fond of 2012. But some good things happened. Right? I'm trying to think of them...instead of saying "I had to have surgery in July!" I say, "there were 11 months in 2012 in which I did not have to have surgery." Hurray!
5. My body is telling me not to do things that are bad for me anyway. I'm going to listen to my body.
6. But still, I'm going to enjoy life by partaking of wine, chocolate, etc in moderate amounts.
7. Do more yoga. (this is always a good idea)
8. Meditate, even if your meditation is to stare out the window into the distance (or the neighbor's house, whatever) and to contemplate your existence.
9. Be in this isness. A good friend of mine once said this, and I have been coming back to it lately as I try to lessen the stress in my life.
10. A corollary of number 9 is this gem: Lean into the pain. I saw this on a TED talk. I'm not even sure what the topic of the TED talk was. But I think of this when I am stressing out, or when I'm fighting with Son. Sometimes, the pain or stress comes from the resistance. If you relax, then sometimes the pain goes away. This is what I've found.

I hope these small thoughts help you as you navigate this (sometimes) difficult season. The point of holidays is not to buy stuff or to stress out, but to take a moment to appreciate what we have, and to enjoy the people in our lives. 

Lessons: The Last List!

I'm pretty sure I've run out of wise things to say, but that won't prevent me from offering this fourth and final list.

1. Drink lots of water.
2. Hug people every day (preferably your family and friends, but strangers work too, if they are willing)
3. Go see live music. It is always fun.
4. Have coffee with friends, weekly. You DO have time, and it reminds you why your life is great.
5. Play games, whatever kind you like. I like cribbage, Settlers of Catan, Mastermind and any card game. Also: tennis.
6. Read things. Preferably (for me) novels, but also blogs and newspapers. And mysteries.
7. Breathe deeply.
8. Remember who you were and thank her for getting you to this point. Forgive her for the stupid things she did, for without the stupid things, you wouldn't be who you are.
   
9. Life is too short for envy.
10. Be generous to a fault.
11. Don't forget the past, but keep moving forward.

Here's hoping I learn some other new things in this next year.

10 More Lessons (whoosh! Almost done!)

1. You know, life is really, really, really short. It only seems long during the last week of classes.
2. Don't sweat the small stuff.
3. The small things are really important. This may seem to contradict #2, but what I mean is, just loving the feeling of your son's head gently resting on your arm: important. Getting mad at same son because his room is dirty or because he spilled water all over the floor: not important.
4. Some things CAN wait until tomorrow: grading papers, cleaning the bathroom, oh, other things.
5. Take time to run in the snow. Or hang out and drink coffee. Or sing really loud in your car. I mean, if you like it, do it. If you don't like it, you may still have to do it, because chances are it's your job.
6. Remember that no ONE thing is your life. Your life isn't your job or your relationships or where you live or what you do, but an amazing combination of all these things. So if one thing changes, you can handle it.
   
7. You should do situps. You really should.
   
8. Give and receive compliments. When someone compliments you, smile and say thank you. Surprisingly, this is often harder than giving compliments.
9. Stress relief is not optional. Find the thing that relieves the pressure and then make that thing a priority: running, Crossfit, writing, alone time. This is a necessity. It's right behind breathing and drinking water.
10. It's all about the people. At the end of the day, you can replace anything you bought, you can buy a new one, you can find a different meal/book/entertainment option. But without your peeps, friends, family, community, who cares? It's all about the people. I'm blessed to have such good ones. Thanks!
    

More Lessons from my 41st Year

Today, since it is exactly one week until my birthday, I will offer another ten lessons. These, I decided, will be about food, since that is one of my obsessions.

1. The things you love might not be good for you, but you can learn to love the things that ARE good for you (like spinach, kale, chard, peppers, etc.)
2. Always, always, always eat breakfast. Always.
   
3. Protein, protein, protein!
4. Lack of protein makes one a total bitch! And yes, by "one" I mean me.
5. Always, always, always carry snacks. Such as: precooked sausage, apple, almonds. Or: cheese stick, orange, cashews. Or: protein bar.
6. If you have healthy snacks in the house, you are more likely to eat healthy snacks. This also works with children. If you just give them the healthy snack, they will usually eat it.
7. Coffee is not optional.
8. Do not eat to live or live to eat. Somewhere in between is best.
   
9. Savor each bite. If it's not worth savoring, you probably shouldn't eat it.
10. A healthy attitude about food is a gift you give yourself and your children.

Birthday Lesson

A fellow blogger, whose birthday is today, made a list of things he's learned, one for each year. Well, I am older than him, so it's going to take me awhile to think of (gasp!) 41 things. So I thought, in the spirit of breaking things down into rounds, I'd start with ten and do a few lists in the week leading up to my birthday.
Ahem. To begin:

1. There are really very few people who are going to love you in spite of who you are, so when you find him, for god's sake, marry him (done!)
2. Savor each second, minute, hour, day with your child, because pretty soon he will grow up and it will be sooner than you think
   
3. Age is all in your mind (because as far as I'm concerned, I'm still 28)
4. The things that you think you shouldn't do or eat are not as good as you imagine them to be when you are denying yourself; Forget about them and move on
5. If you are not improving as you get older, something is wrong (and the benchmark for "improve" is all up to you)
6. Weightlifting is hard; writing a novel is harder
7. Keep trying new things
8. Fail. Fail better. Fail again.
9. What looks like failure is really just an opportunity to try a different way
10. You must do the one thing you think you cannot do (thanks Eleanor Roosevelt). Like: Crossfit or writing a novel.