Today I registered Son for the neighborhood Kindergarten. This is our back-up back-up plan, given that the back-up plan (ELP) fell through (apparently Son is not "gifted" or at least not Technically Gifted, only Mildy Smart or just Not Incredibly Dumb). I'm not bitter, but Son has not even started school yet, and already I'm jaded about standarized testing. I can't wait until I have to get him a Life Coach when he's a Freshman in High School so that he can get into a Really Good College.
Anyway, it was the standard Elementary School Auditorium affair, except every person (except me and one other woman) had Other Children besides the Kindergartener, most of whom needed to cry and scream while we, The Adults, were supposed to be listening to The Speakers, most of whom were unnecessary, except, perhaps, the School Nurse, who informed us in exactly what ways our children could/could not be drugged during school hours.
My favorite, of course, was the PTA President, who announced that she had decided that "there needs to be a law that everyone who has a student in Kindergarten also needs to have a student in High School at the same time" in order to fully appreciate the joy of the Kindergartener. I wanted to leap up and hurt her. But I prefer Otterbutt's response (I already told her this story), "Where do I send the condoms?"
Son really wants to go to this school now, because one of his best buddies from preschool is going there. And I have to admit, I love the fact that it took us about 10 minutes to walk there. But it was just plain depressing, and I don't mean the architecture. Where were all my neighbors?
Oh yeah, their kids all go to private school.
And so it goes.
post-script: The nice parent volunteer from the Open Classroom called me this evening to let me know that Son has, in fact, been admitted to their Kindergarten and will be in afternoon Kindergarten. This is actually good for us, as it is longer and only four days a week. None of the ruse of half-day half-day Fridays, which is like, one hour.
So the story has a happy ending, for us. What about those kids trapped in that school with that crazy PTA president? I worry for their souls.